Home again Home again

ok so I know I said I'd post pictures but it will have to wait again. Just a quick update on us.

Charlotte is doing really well, I've learned to Cathe her pretty good. If she's relaxed it's way easier. Thank goodness she likes her pacifier to help soothe her when I change her diaper. We have to Cathe her every 3-4 hours. She's on ditropan now and probably for the rest of her life. I need to do some research on that to see if there is anything that has less harsh side affects. I hope they don't effect her but if they do I'll for sure need to look into something different.

Kathryn keeps getting Charlotte confused with her cousin Caleb who is also a baby. and I've been called Grandma a few times since being home too. I love having her home. She sure lightens up my mood and likes to have fun all the time!

I'm doing good. I wish I produced more milk for Charlotte but I guess It's just one of those body things that I have to deal with. I put on a pair of jeans that I could wear pre-pregnancy and they fit fine! So relieved I didn't gain as much as I did with Kathryn which was weird because of all the yummy food we ate all the time.

Back to making food on our own and such is different too. Oh yeah doing dishes again by hand is not fun at all.

Anyway that's what we've been up to for awhile. Pictures coming soon I promise.

Day 4 of life!

All these posts of Charlotte have come from Matthew so I thought I'd write a few of my thoughts of the last few days. Sorry no pictures Matthew couldn't find the camera cord in the room when I sent him home for some things. It will have to wait. I get discharged tomorrow so hopefully tomorrow you will get a few more. (all of them are about the same as I don't have her in clothes yet and she's just bundled all the time)



Monday Morning-



Sunday night was a little restless. I got up to use the bathroom about every 3 hours and every time I could tell my tummy was really tight. It didn't hurt but was just tight. So we got up around 6:45, showered and noticed I had lost my mucous plug. I ate some oatmeal and a piece of toast with PB on it then we were off to my appointments. I could tell on the way that every bump on the way was way more prominent. but still I thought nothing of it.

We saw a different doctor then Dr Wu, he's on vacation visiting family in China and Japan, She asked how I was doing and felt my tummy and as she did she's like have you been contracting like this often? I say yes and then she gets me ready to check my dilation and how soft my cervix is. She says I was dilated to like 1.5 and that she'd like me to skip my NST appt and just go to L & D for monitoring to see if my contractions were regular. I thought it was a little over kill but well they know better right. I also had an ultrasound at 11 that I wanted to get to cause it was my last complete one that would get all her measurements and things. I wanted one last inutero picture of her face too. But well we got to L&D and got me hooked up and low ad behold I was contracting about every 3 minutes, not to bad but bad enough for my uterus that they said we'd be having a baby today. They also checked my cervix and I had already progressed to a 3 in a matter of an hour. So we got admitted and got ready to have a baby!


C-Section
So I still haven't decided which I prefer, Vaginal or C-Section. I guess it doesn't really make a difference as I can't ever try for a V-Back but still I can't seem to come to a good conclusion. I think the worst part of a c-section procedure is being all lucid and there to get the spinal done. I hated that for my first surgery and I didn't like the second one either. But man it worked fast and my leg did a huge jerk and made me scream and then there was no feeling at all. This guy who put in the spinal did a great job. I love first time tries that work!

Well after that worked they laid me down and started washing my tummy which I couldn't feel at all in just a matter of minutes. Then they put up the screen and they started doing what they do. I didn't feel a thing until they started pulling and tugging on things inside me. It was really the weirdest non-feeling I've ever experienced. It was like they were rearranging my insides. It took a lot longer then I thought too.

Matthew was there to take pictures of her being taken out and he actually watched a lot more of it then I thought he would. Didn't look sick at all. Just kept making jokes about things that were going on. We'll post those pictures later but some are gross so I don't know... They had us take a picture of my uterus where they did the incision for the first surgery that is quite gross. But by 12:43pm little Charlotte had arrived and was whisked through a little door way to be cleaned up and all that jazz. I was then put back together which took a really long time. They moved me to my room shortly after and I was able to move my thigh muscles but that was it. They wouldn't let me go and see Charlotte until I could move my legs and function that way. It was 5 hours later that I got to go see her. Matthew got to go see her way before me and take pictures. He said he didn't even hold her so I could be the first.

I have 2 long scars now. I thought they were going to cut in the same place but no, they went about and inch and a half lower then the first one. So no low rise bikinis for me... ha ha

I started pumping about 4 hours later and have done so every 3-4 hours. I thought yipee I'm getting some good amount of colostrum the first few pumps and then it stopped for the next day. and just last night has it started up again and I'm getting about an ounce. That is another thing I like better about a c-section is that your in the hospital long enough that your milk has a chance to come in before you go home and get so frustrated that you don't have anything to feed your baby. Everyone has been so helpful and kind and willing to help me out. I'm still getting more from one side then the other but I'm confident that Charlotte will be a good eater. I pumped through the night and let the nurses feed her the first night.

It's all about being consistent right. I go up every 3 hours to change her diaper and try to feed her. I love the skin to skin time I get with her. If it is only an hour here an hour there or even less. I've only tried cathing her once and I was not successful. I must not know my own anatomy cause Matthew did it like his very first try. We'll try again today and tomorrow until I can get it. It's probably something we'll do for her anyway. Her Urology appointment is either Tuesday or next Friday and we'll know there if it's absolutely necessary of if it's just something we decide to do or not.

So far all the nurses and docs and everyone has been so good to me. All the people we run into from the evaluation and the first procedure remember us and ask how things are and all say something to the effect of I can't believe how good her back looks or she's doing awesome just like her mom!! Ha ha I'm just that good!!

Thursday, Earth day
We were supposed to have this precious girl today at 10 but as you read earlier my body had other plans. So I've just been pumping all day just waiting to here when Charlotte is back and ready for me to hold and comfort her. It's been 2.5 hours so it should be anytime now. I will get discharged tomorrow and then Charlotte to follow on Monday or Tuesday. We'll have to stick around the Family house for that week if we can't get that Urology appointment set up for Tuesday instead of Friday. But she'll be all ours and I can hold her all I want.
For Earth day I'd like all to know that UCSF is like the most Eco Friendly hospital. Well San Fran is the same but there are garbage, compost, recycle bins everywhere and they've even started new programs for locally grown things so they don't have to transport across country in big rigs for their food and such. Save our Earth, we live here and our kids will have to deal with our garbage later if we don't.

So there are some rambling thoughts so far. I'll probably come back to this and have to add in some other thoughts and feelings and such.
Sorry again no new pictures we'll get them up soon. And to those who actually read the whole thing thanks to you too. Birth stories are actually nice to read. well I like them.

The Comparisons Begin...

Welcome to the world baby Charlotte

Born: 4/19/2010, 12:45pm PST

Place: UCSF San Francisco

Weight: 6 lbs 13 oz

Hieght: 20 in

Curly brown-ish hair about 1 inch long. This was the cause of Heather's massive amount of heartburn. I can only imagine how long it would have been if she went to week 40, vs week 36 & 4 days.
The horizontal line you see in the middle of the photo is the scar from her pre-natal surgery. It seems to be healing very nicely. The doctors are all impressed and feel that she will be able to leave San Francisco early to return to her sister. This scar is about 3 inches long.
Heather & Charlottes first photo together. Heather had the miserable time of not being able to see the baby in person for about 5 hours after surgery. But she was very determined to get there :)


In other news, Charlotte is moving very very well, and has been able to urinate on her own and to have a BM on her own. It may not sound exciting, but it really is :)

Kathryns Easter Dress

I got this really cute little shirt and skirt outfit for Kathryn for Easter, but since she was in Snowflake for Easter it was to cold for her to wear up there. So now she's back at my parents in Gilbert it's warm enough to wear it.

She's so adorable. Yellow is certainly a good color on my sweet little girl. Oh I miss her so much! 2 more weeks and maybe a few days! I can't wait to get home to my precious Kathryn. She's grown up so much since we've left!
She certainly is my big girl!

Words in my blog

So I've seen this on other people's blogs a few times and I thought it was really neat. So I decided to try it. I used a website called Wordle to make this picture.

Big Belly, Big Belly

I guess I should get some belly pictures for you all to enjoy. I feel enormous! I'll have one more picture the day before surgery to get the full effect of the last 3 weeks of pregnancy! I should get a tape measure to see how big around I actually am, scary I know, but I don't have one so I'll get some of the yarn I have and just get one piece to take home and see how much smaller my belly gets after 2 weeks. Here's to hoping it gets a lot smaller!!!

Here is 35 weeks

and here is 36 weeks

and here is Matthew work station

Looks pretty comfy huh. And I thought this chair was for me...

Ups and downs and more downs

I am so ready to have this baby. Anyone that follows my status reports knows we're having some issues with our testings the last two times. I am also so uncomfortable all the time it's just TIME to be done and get HOME!

Last Thursday at our BPP, Testing, Charlotte wasn't doing her movements like she should. Her heart rate was fine, she was doing her breathing movements but she was just not moving so after an hour at testing they said because I was such a special case they wanted me to go up to Labor and Delivery for further testing. So up to the hospital we go for another hour and a half to be hooked to a monitor. She started moving around when we got up there but still. She should have made some movement in the hour we were at the testing place first.

Then Monday for our all day appointments we had just started the ultrasound and the power went out. It was out for about an hour. We finish the ultrasound and run to get something to eat before the OB appointment. We get to the OB appointment with just 5 minutes to spare and he's running late too. They send me to testing first and this time she's barely done her movements ad good heart rate but she's now not doing any of her breathing movements. We've had perfect scores for the last month till the last two times we get 8 out of 10. They score it out of 10 some how.

So at the OB appointment Dr Wu is worried we might be missing something about the baby because we're just so excited that I'm actually going to make it to 37 weeks and not early. So I have to be extra conscience of her movements and if she doesn't move in a two hour period I have to call up ad get in to have them test and look at her.

So far I've noticed her move every hour I'm awake and some even when I'm trying to sleep. So far so good. But we'll see. The Doc said that by now they should or could be getting into a sleep pattern where they wouldn't move as much but shouldn't last more then like 30-45 minutes.


As for me, I miss Kathryn more then anything. 'It hurts me' as Kathryn would say in her sweet voice to not get to hold her or take care of her. 'it hurts me' to just talk on skype and see her get grumpy at us for not being there. Hopefully we only have 3 weeks left. and 4 days of that will be in a hospital and then 2 weeks of that will be going back and forth from the hospital to feed our little Charlotte. I hope it goes by fast.

I'm getting really sick of giving myself insulin. I used to not mind it but every poke seems to hurt worse and worse. I've got little bruises all over my belly from these little pokes. I can't sleep at night I came to bed at like 10:30 last night and didn't fall asleep till after 1. then Matthew woke up at 2. he'd been asleep since 8. Thankfully he didn't keep me awake. Just enough to wake me up to go to the bathroom. I got up at 8, went to breakfast by 9 and back here about 10:30 and then at 11 we both took naps till 2:00. I usually don't nap but man was I tired. I'm in for another night of no sleeping though.

We'll I guess my post was labeled Up's and Downs and I think I've only talked about downs so let me see, what positive thing can I talk about now. We do only have 3 weeks left! Only 1 more week of insulin!! We are the start winners for getting this far!! The weather should be good for a week. No rain in sight till Monday and Tuesday next week. 24 was awesome last night and GLEE starts again tonight!!! Matthew got his hair cut today so he's not a shaggy dog any more. I didn't gain any weight from last appt to this weeks appt. So if I loose the max of 15 pounds after baby I'll be back to where I was when I started the HCG diet last year. Not to bad. Not like Kathryn anyway!

So some good is here and well we all have our days.

Baby's Birthday will be April 22

We had a great day of doctor visits today. All is still well in babyville. They scheduled our C-section today. Which they said they haven't scheduled anyone. No one has gotten that far or looked as good as me. HOORAY for me!

Anyway, I go in the night of the 21st for some blood work and stuff in case I happen to need a transfusion and then bright and early the 22nd I check in at 8am and have this little miracle at 10am.

So it's coming to a close. only 2 more doctor visits. I can't believe it. I was joking with Matthew today that it sounds really bad that we've been here since January and probably won't get to leave till May. We've been gone for almost a half a year when you say it that way. No one needs to know that we actually arrived the 25th of January and will leave about the 10th of May. Still that is a really long time to be away from home and my sweet Kathryn.

The words we use

So I follow a lot of blogs now of mom's with kids that have Spina Bifida and I am so amazed at their strength and knowledge. This video is a CNN new's article from a women who was born with no fibula bones and is now a model, actress and sports athlete. 'You just don't look disabled'
She talks about the word DISABLED and what it means. What the dictionary says that it means.

This is from the blog where I found the video.


disabled

Part of Speech: adjective

Definition: incapacitated

Synonyms: broken-down, confined, decrepit, disarmed, handicapped, helpless, lame hurt,incapable, infirm, laid-up, maimed, out-of-action, out-of-commission, paralyzed,powerless, run-down, sidelined, stalled, weakened, worn-out, wounded, wrecked

Antonyms: able, healthy


I have a request from all my family and friends that when you met Charlotte for the first time and down the road, that you won't feel sorry for her or my family or think of her as being disabled. Matthew and I are set on giving her the best opportunities we can and helping her know that she can do anything she sets her mind to. She will be strong, healthy, fully capable of life and living well! She will not be any of those synonyms above. She will be first and for most a Daughter of our Heavenly Father, and to take from a previous post I made I am totally Confident in her Creation! Our Heavenly Father wouldn't send us someone that was disabled by these terms. He sent us His child to love and to care for. And we WILL!!!!

What happens after Charlotte arrives

I got a good question from my Sister in Law Micah. She wanted to know what happens after Charlotte arrives. Well that question is kind of hard to answer with a case like Spina Bifida.

Things that could be something we have to worry about
1. Hydrocephalus - Water on the brain- this is what we hope won't happen because of having surgery early but still could be an issue.
1.a This they will watch for while she's in the NICU for the first 2 weeks. See if she's eating and breathing fine on her own and if she is irritable or not. those things can be the need of a shunt.

2. bowel/ bladder problems - in the NICU they will Cathe Charlotte for the first 48 hours and then stop. We will learn how to do it as we may have to cathe her for the rest of her life. After she is discharged from the hospital we will have a Urology appointment to find out what her bladder looks like and see if cathing is actually necessary.

3. Mobilization - She may or may not be partially paralyzed from the point of her lesion down. We won't know her mobility until she is older.

4. Latex allergy - No more balloons for us. She has a higher chance of having a latex allergy so all doctor visits have to be latex free.


5. Arnold Chiari Malformation - This one is also hoped to be reversed because of the surgery. This is when the brain is actually being sucked down the spinal column therefore causing the hydrocephalus. If this is bad I've been told she will have to have surgery to release the pressure in her head.


But all those things are things we can't assume will or will not happen. That is why so many moms of kids with SB say that the pregnancy is the worst because of all the unknowns. But that once your little baby arrives all that seems to just be something that you do. You still have a little baby that needs lots of love and kisses and will enjoy everything another baby would enjoy.
I feel so at peace about this little angel coming to our home that I know that the bad things that could happen won't. I just hope we can make it to the 37 week mark for her benefit.


So time line for any one interested.

1. 37 weeks exactly is April 22nd
2. I will be in the hospital for 4 days because of the C-Section
3. Charlotte will be in the NICU for 2 weeks for monitoring and such to be sure she won't need any further care before we come home. She has to be 14 days old to fly home anyway.
4. the Day after we're discharged we have the urology appointment
5. depending on the time of that appt we come home that day or the next morning!

So max baring no other complications we come home May 10th!!!


Micah I hope that answered your questions or maybe I gave to much info. anyway that is what we can expect might happen.

SO MANY UNKNOWNS!!

33 weeks 3 days

From all the fun I had with my little Kathryn, we had a little scare at my next appointment the next Monday. My Ultrasound showed a fluid level of 8 when the week before it was at a 19. They told me it is still in a safe range and not to worry, just to 'take it easy' and drink more water. I did both. I've been having Matthew wheel me in the wheelchair more, which I hate cause it hurts my back. But I did and then the following Thursday at my BPP testing my fluid was back up to a 16. So no hospitalization for me. If it had gotten to a 5 they would hospitalize me. I sure don't want to be stuck in a hospital for any time besides having this baby. I hate hospitals.

I've now talked with two other mom's that had the fetal surgery and both of them had to go in because of low amniotic fluid. I need to ask the nurses if that is the main reason people go in early.

I have 3 weeks 5 days left to 37 weeks exactly. I CAN DO IT!

I have some things I want to finish while I'm not able to do a lot like finish my book and finish another one that I found in the library that looks really good and finish typing up the letters my mom has sent me.

So far so good.

Muir Woods

Our last day with Kathryn was spent walking around the Muir Woods. Famous for the filming spot of Return of the Jedi where the Ewoks live.

It was beautiful! The redwoods there were amazing. I loved every moment except for the fact that my back hurt most of the time. It was still so amazing to be out in such a wonderful place. How can anyone say there is no God in a place like that. That could not have been an accident.

Kathryn was a cutie in there too. My little Ewok. She was so determined to walk all by herself. So many people had to do a double take on our little cutie.

There was one section called I think the Quiet Cathedral. It was so quite. Couldn't hear a thing. Which was amazing as there was a stream right next to us. The tree's must have just stopped everything.

Kathryn fell asleep before we even got out of the park. Then slept all the way home as well. I got to play with her all afternoon. She was such a joy. Everyone here at the family house adored her. She loved playing with one of the kids here Kristian.

My mom and she left that night. It was so sad to see them go but I could tell I was getting more worn out then I should have.

We only have one more month and Skype will have to do!

I hope you enjoyed our little week with Kathryn I sure did!

Pier 39 and St Patty's Day!

On Wednesday we took the train and a trolley to Pier 39. We got to see the Sea Lions and ride the carousel. Kathryn loved the carousel. She wanted to go over and over again on different animals. She really wanted the black horse and as soon as it ended she said she wanted to ride the bunny right next to her. We only had enough for one ride so she was a little disappointed.

We stopped at a Crazy hat store and did our only celebrating of St Patrick's Day. The hats were fun. We got Kathryn a little dog in a carrier. She found these and went to town picking them all up and walking around the store like she was the owner of all these cutie little puppies.

We ate at a wonderful place were my mom and I got the clam chowder in a bread bowl. SO YUMMY! This time Kathryn didn't fall asleep on the way home. She liked being on the train way to much.

I have really wanted to get to Ghiradelli (sp) Square but Matthew won't let me as I'm the diabetic who gets an increase in my insulin every week. Maybe he'll let me go someday before we leave.

I still can't get over how fun it is to watch and see how Kathryn has grown in the last month and a half. It amazes me the things she knows. I like to sing to her 'You are my Sunshine' and while here she finally realized that I was calling her My Sunshine. She'd get her face all scrunched up and say 'I'm your sunshine" and laugh with me. So adorable. I hope she doesn't' mind if I sing that song to Charlotte cause they will both be my Sunshine's!!

California Academy of Sciences and the Beach!

Tuesday we went to the Academy of Sciences. Kathryn loved all the fish and the kids play area. It's amazing the amount of different ocean fish/animals there are. They had an Anaconda and an Albino Alligator. We got to touch some of the star fish too. Kathryn wouldn't touch any of them. I should have sat in the wheel chair more that day. Well I should have sat in it more all week.

My mom I think had more fun and was fascinated by more of the animals then the rest of us were. She said she likes going to places like that on her own so that she doesn't have to keep up with those of us who just look and pass by and not really look and take in all there is to see.

Kathryn got kind of cranky by the end so we didn't end up going in the rain forest part or to see the planetarium. She fell asleep again on the way home. After naps we went to the beach before dinner. I think this was Kathryn's favorite part of the trip. She got to chase the water back to the ocean with Matthew and then get chased by the water over and over.

This beach had an over abundance of sand dollars everywhere. Mostly all broken into pieces but my mom found one whole one and I found one with just a little hole on top.

Kathryn also just loved playing in the sand. I think it reminded her of the little sand box at grandmas. I told the Doc on Monday that I thought this was her favorite part because of it being the biggest Sand box she'd ever seen!! He laughed and laughed at this.

The beach is so nice to just walk down. It is really hard for me to walk back out of the sand though. Wears me out just thinking about it. But I love going and just listening to the waves and watching the sun go down.

Each day was a new adventure with Kathryn. I loved every moment. I just wish it could have been a little longer.

Golden Gate Park with Kathryn

Our first outing for fun with Kathryn was to Golden Gate park to meet up with my Cousins Katie and John. We walked for a really long time throughout the Botanical Gardens. It is so beautiful here. Kathryn had so much fun that she actually fell asleep on the way back to the house. It was so fun to see her run and play and enjoy the out doors. I wish I could keep up with her. Soon enough I'll get all my strength back and I'll be running circles with her.

It was really nice to see John and Katie. I haven't seen them for years. They have been doing good here in San Fran and even said their relationship has grown better and better the last year or so. They sure looked happy!

Each day Kathryn was here we did something fun. This was Monday, my appointment day so it was just a walk around the gardens but it was worth it. We all went to my ultrasound and I had hoped Kathryn would enjoy seeing her baby sister. but She just sat there and didn't really understand. I think though by the end of the week she new her baby sister would be Charlotte as she would say her name and point to my tummy.

Another post soon about our adventures on Tuesday!

Just me again

So I'm 31 weeks today. Hooray for making into the 30 week range! Anything goes now! we'll wait another 5 weeks to have her though well that's my hope.

I still have appointments all day Mondays and now next week I have to start having the BPP testing m(stress test on the baby) twice a week. Monday and Thursday's are my days at the doctors office.

They keep uping my insulin for fasting and breakfast, we might get it right someday.

We're in the new room here at the family house so that we have room for my mom and kathryn to come this Saturday!! Hooray!! It's the nicest room on the 3rd floor for sure. I don't know if I'll want to give it up after they leave. but we don't need a room with 3 beds and a really nice closet...

We haven't been doing much lately. Matthew has a deadline to meet for Monday and has been working hard so I don't get to go out without him. I've been reading a series of the Enchanted Forest. It's a fun book that I've been picking out one of the smaller characters and telling Matthew the story from that perspective instead of the main character. It's fun since the last book's character was a rabbit that turned into a 6 foot rabbit, that turned into a 7 ft donkey that turned blue, then grew wings then floated above the floor 6 inches then became insubstanial back to a regular rabbit throughout the book. Interesting stuff. This last book I picked a little gold lizard named Suz. who likes to stand on his tail and can tell if your lieing or telling the truth.

I've also been sleeping a lot which makes it hard to want to sleep at night. I need a happy medium here. maybe try shorter naps..

I've also been typeing up some letters that my mom sent over that she had written to her parents. It's intersting the types of things I'm learning about my mom when there were just 4 of us girls around. I was the best baby... ha ha I also got to type up the letter that my dad sent to my mom's parents to ask permission to marry her. Matthew had a hayday with this one cause my dad sent the letter after he had proposed and my dad gave Matthew a hard time cause he didn't talk with my dad until after he had proposed to me and not before.

Everything looks good so far with the baby and myself. Everyone is still impressed with how I'm doing and how things are going for us.

well this is too long and I have no new pictures to post so next time I'll be ready for some new pictures. hope this wasn't to boring of a read if you actually got through it.

Pregnant Belly

We went to the beach last night for just a few minutes as it was really cold and windy but I had to get some pictures of how BIG I'm getting. And a good sunset shot! I love the new camera!!

I'm 30 weeks along. I guess the jacket doesn't do this justice cause I am in fact quite large. THis will have to do for now.

"Be Confident in Your Creation"

I was just blog hopping and came across this post about a book called "Be Confident in Your Creation." I first read a post about a lady who has a 9 month old with SB who is feeling bad about the so called milestones that a normal 9 month old should have and they are not there yet. How people ask how old she is and say things like oh she'll be running around the house soon or she must be crawling all over and yet she's not close to either of those things.

It got me thinking about how I'm going to handle a child that may be slower in her learning. Kathryn is getting so smart and so fast. I've been gone only a month and I can tell she's learned a ton more in the last month then before. What is it going to be like to have a child that may be developmentally slower then her sister. How will I cope with people asking what she is doing at this age. and have to answer with a head nod or nothing at all. SB is such a different type of problem that I'm sure I won't want to go into all the in's and out's with everyone that we meet.

I know I have months before any of that happens. It's just the last few posts I've read just got me thinking about how I feel know and how it will feel later on.

One person who recommended the book below said she felt guilt the first 3 years, like it was all her fault. It was her job for 9 months to care and nourish the baby and yet something did in fact still go wrong. God was not to blame but her because she couldn't provide what that baby needed. I don't feel guilt at all and I don't blame God for any of this. Mostly I am grateful that she will still have a life to live. She'll be able to grow up and learn and have a job and get married. She'll have a loving family all around her. I'm just grateful that I can give her that love and care that she will need. I know it's going to be hard but who said motherhood wasn't. I'm grateful to the MOM's study to allow us to maybe help one of the aspects of SB that she won't have to go through. Even though I complain and feel sore and want to be home and miss my little Kathryn I know we're made the best choice that we could have for this little angel that kicks me all the time. Every kick reminds me that she has some mobility and that she's still there ready to join the world to be loved by her parents and family.

I found this scripture on the post with the book recommendation. I think I need to ponder and pray about this and really know that we are all God's creations even those with disabilities.

Psalm 139:13-14 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it well.


Below is an excerpt from the book.
"Did you realize that you are the work of the only true God? The One God who formed and created all heaven and earth and the same God who only has power to rule all creation is the same God who took the time and care to mold you as a potter molds the clay! This fact should make you jump out of your seat and praise God for your creation. You are the possession of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Perhaps some perspective will help you wrap your brain around your personal value. The price of a well-made quality guitar can range anywhere from $250.00 to $1,000.00. Now you take that same guitar and have a big name country music star sign the guitar all of a sudden, the value of that guitar skyrockets. The personal signature of an important person adds to the value of the object. You have the signature of God in your life. If the signature of a country music star can add to the value of a guitar, how much more would you say the signature of God adds to your value? You are priceless because God created your personally and left His fingerprint of expression."


I know God lives and that he love each and everyone of us. He doesn't do things by mistake or to just make our lives hard. He does things to make our lives better and to learn from the challenges that He throws our way.

Great afternoon to me for finding these posts to make me think more deeply about my feelings and gratitude for my baby.

3.6 mile walk to a theater

Last Friday we decided to go see Percy Jackson, the Lightning Thief and the closest theater is 3.6 miles away from us. So Matthew felt like getting a lot of exercise so we walked, well I walked a mile of it and then Matthew pushed me the rest of the way. Which is saying a ton cause it's not very flat here in San Francisco. But we got some cool pictures along the way.

This is from the 7th floor of the theater. Yep this was a 12 story theater. Every 3 floors there was 4 theaters. Crazy huh. My first multi-level theater.

Which one is me, ha ha

This house was just awesome. Gold and very shiny. This picture doesn't do it justice but well just know it was cool!

Matthew really likes this house/office building. He says he wants one like this with the rock on the outside so he can rock climb the walls. I'm totally ok with that!

This was just a really awesome tree. I love all the greenery here and foliage. It's beautiful.

I window into another world. or just the place where swamp thing lives.

Some more pretty flowers and foliage along the road.

This was a really long walk for both of us. I know I couldn't have walked the whole way but being pushed in a wheelchair isn't that much better. especially with all the bumpy sidewalks. The only smooth sidewalk we've found here is over by the piers. We went there last night for dinner. Well I hope you enjoy the pictures and I'll try to take a bunch more of how pretty this place really is.